What will the world do?

 Something has been gnawing at the edges of everything I do

Can't sleep

Can't enjoy a good cry

Anxious about what the future may bring

I will end

I have known this forever

But now I feel it in every fiber of my being

Why now?

I should be enjoying everything

My marriage

My children

My comfortable life

There is a bright spot inside

That just won't let go

I want adventure

I want the satisfaction of doing a job well done

Youth is what I yearn for

Really?

Not youth, but a calmness that one enjoys in being older and wiser.

When will it come?

Maybe respect?

Is it too late for that?

I respect me,

Army Wife, Mother, Grandmother, Teacher, Author, Poet, Sister and Sister-in- Law.

I am living a life

Of self-satisfaction

And maybe I don't want it to end

Yet.